Naked Winter, Tell Me Your Secrets

It's cold tonight but it doesn't stop me from sitting on my patio wrapped in a blanket while otherwise completely naked. I'm drawing on my pipe and letting the sticky drug sink into my bones as I watch the spirals of smoke slink into the sky. A song drifts out the open door as I watch the darkness creep along the alleyway. Kissing you has been on my mind a lot lately and I'm thinking about it again here in my little dark hiding spot.Your lips are becoming a preoccupation of mine. They look soft. Touchable. Like I want to run my tongue along the edge of them before exploring the deeper depths of your mouth. I close my eyes as your image materializes on the inside of my eyelids.

The cats are milling about my feet exploring the dark crevices with soft mews and quiet feet. I'm watching the first crystalline flakes of snow drift towards the ground in the dim light of the streetlamp. It looks like sugar dusting the air. The winter night is cold and still. Soft as my breath lingers on my lips. I think about you dancing before me so many nights ago. The club we were in was loud and hot as that summer night dripped humidity down our skin in stark contrast to the gentle winter's night I drowse in now. You gyrated, slinked, and shimmied left and right. Your skin glistening in the heat through your see-through shirt. Was my intention see-through that night? My want, could you see it? Did you know how badly I wanted to touch you? Explore those twisting muscles in time with the rhythm of the music. It's just... I was never sure you wanted me to. Never sure you saw that need in my fingers and mirrored it.

And the summer slipped into fall and the fall blew in the winter winds and the snow is starting to fall tonight. My bed is empty. My heart is following each drifting snowflake on it's long journey to the ground. My naked toes are cold. My eyes half-closed I think of kissing you when I should have. My life is full of 'should-haves'. I sigh against the chair and whiskers tickle my ankles as a tail twists against my shin. The cold wind drifts through my hair whispering to me little secrets only the winter can know. I rise, draw the blanket around my naked skin, step back through the door to the warmth inside my strange little world as the cats follow closely at my feet. I settle back down with cats now wrapped around my lap and I write this down. All my little secrets for you to find somewhere out there in this cold, dark night.